Five Minutes With Life writing alumna Carole Aubree-Dumont

Life Writing Programme alumna Carole Aubree-Dumont won the Emerging Authors prize at this year’s Brighton Book Festival with a reading from her memoir Dumb. Here she talks about her writing journey.

When do you first remember wanting to be a writer? I could say that I have wanted to be a writer for as long as I can remember, but the truth is that until I turned forty, I’d resisted the idea of becoming a writer! It took my being told that my second child would never speak for me to start writing. As my partner and I were trying to find out about our son’s condition, I found myself jotting down notes on post-its about the multiple hospital appointments and tests we were undergoing. This felt like an unprecedented acceleration of life, and I was desperate to record a process which at times felt almost hallucinatory.  Writing became a necessity.

Why did you decide to join the Creative Writing Programme? In 2015, a year after my son had been diagnosed with a lifelong genetic condition, I joined a Life Writing course with Arvon. Towards the end, writing the scene of my son’s diagnosis, I sensed that this was a seminal scene, the starting point for a bigger story. Back in Brighton, following this transformative experience, I felt an urge to write the whole story, and understood I was going to have to make myself accountable.

I was desperate to learn more about the craft and technique specific to life-writing.

Being French, I was also feeling daunted by the prospect of writing a whole book in a language that wasn’t my native one. I had a feeling that it would be helpful to submit my prose to fellow writers who would be honest and let me know which Frenchisms were acceptable, and which were not…

Did you start writing your memoir – Dumb –  on the course? I wrote most of the contemporary part of my memoir on the course: the journey of discovering my son’s genetic condition due to a mutated gene silently passed over three generations. I shared quite a few traumatic scenes, and it was important to feel safe and held by fellow life writers whilst doing so. I also started exploring the other thread in my memoir, the past story concerning the silences in my French family.

Who were your tutors? My first tutor was Clare Best, who immediately grasped my quest. Clare has a soft yet powerful way of supporting writers. It felt like she was quietly on my side, holding my hand. She was the first person who read a scene concerning the French thread in my story. This was proving much more difficult to write, and her encouragement played a crucial part. Then came Hannah Vincent. I loved her energy and no-nonsense approach to teaching as well as her passion for rigorous, impeccable prose. Prior to that, my knowledge in life-writing had been focussed on French writers like Annie Ernaux and Marguerite Duras. Hannah made me aware of authors such as Rachel Cusk and Claire Keegan. Holly Dawson gave a one-day workshop, and I remember thanking her at the end, realising that perhaps writing and caring weren’t incompatible, that I could make this work. One day, my story might help raise awareness about the lives of disabled children as well as their carers.

What was the most impactful element of the course for you? Even if there were a couple of bruising moments, I think for me it was about daring to share my writing within a safe group. Until then, I’d been quite secretive (after all, I was writing a story about French secrets and silence embodied by a speechless child!). I learnt that writing is about generosity. Receiving thoughtful feedback from my peers helped me toughen up and consider the possibility of submitting my work to competitions.

Likewise, I learnt an awful lot from others’ writing. Not just craft, but tastes as well as interests and how, if I wanted to reach British readers, a French story that felt natural to me would need a good amount of contextualising.

Could you tell us about the inspiration behind Dumb? A blend of memoir and genetic-historical detective story, Dumb is an account of inherited silence over three generations, told through the voice of a mother desperate to help her son speak. How do you reconcile the guilt that comes with learning that your son’s condition is genetically inherited through you? What do you make of the silence you have always felt inside you and the knowledge that you have passed it to your son?

One book that inspired me is Catherine Cho’s Inferno, a Guardian Memoir of the Year 2020. The account of her postpartum psychosis interwoven with tales from her past and the influence of Korean traditions, it combines raw personal memoir of motherhood and the universal theme of intergenerational trauma.

 What happened after the course finished? In recognition of the promise of my memoir-in-progress, I was awarded a place on TLC Free Reads scheme by New Writing South, with a manuscript assessment from The Literary Consultancy.

For the same project, I was awarded a Developing Your Creative Practice Grant by the Arts Council in 2022. I was then selected to be part of the 2023/24 London Library Emerging Writers Programme.

I should say that there was a fair bit of rejection too. It’s part of the process – you just swallow it in and come back with a vengeance!

Dumb was shortlisted in the Mslexia Memoir competition and your synopsis was then featured in the magazine. Could you tell us more about this? This took place during the pandemic, when I was engulfed in caring and writing became my lifeline. I’d subscribed to Mslexia, the magazine for women who write, and spotted their submission slot for their ‘Story of my Life’ page.  I submitted my pitch letter. Subsequently, the synopsis was selected to feature in the magazine, and I was lucky to receive detailed feedback from… memoirist and agent Catherine Cho!

 By 2021, pandemic still raging, I’d managed to write a full draft. Hearing about Mslexia’s Memoir competition, I sensed that my project was a really good match. Not only did Mslexia want a woman’s story, but one which carried the sense of a quest. In retrospect, I’d say that I was starting to understand that not every competition would suit me. This prepared me for the future in terms of submitting to agents. I was learning that I should do my research and submit to those agents who would be passionate about my memoir of silence, legacy and resistance.

Still, I was shocked to learn that Dumb had been shortlisted for the Mslexia Competition. As it happened, I was with my twelve-year daughter when I received their email, and this felt right. One day she would be a woman too and might remember that her mother’s story had been endorsed by a panel of women judges, in the midst of difficult circumstances.

And you just won the Emerging Author’s Prize at this year’s Brighton Book Festival – how did that feel? It’s the first time I have WON any competition! It’s such a vote of confidence. It’s also lovely in a simple way: I have lived in Brighton for twenty years, and winning the Emerging Author’s Prize at this year’s Festival has increased my feeling of belonging here. Winning made me realise that I am no longer afraid to use my experience as an actress in France (a long time ago!) and as a voice-over artist in the UK; also, of becoming a single mother and being transformed by the process of writing memoir. Everything that happens in your life informs your writing and the process of becoming an author.

What are your next steps for Dumb now? In light of the Salt Path scandal, and in the midst of unprecedented attacks on disabled people, carers and SEND children, I dare hope that mine is the kind of story that engages authentically with the relentless reality of disability, and that manages to find joy inside it. I will keep submitting, hoping that someone in the publishing industry will take it on.

Are you working on anything new? Yes! After the triple diagnosis received in 2014, I thought that life would not, could not reach that level of intensity again. But it did this year, as I separated from my partner of twenty years and became a carer for my parents across the Channel, while my daughter received a diagnosis of ADHD – all this, in parallel to my choosing to live a ‘Simple Passion’…

Society is very keen to silence woman carers, as though our mothering means we have lost our bodies and capacity for pleasure. Defending and protecting these is something I feel passionate about. I’ve learnt a lot about what makes me write and why I write memoir. Somehow, life becomes so intense that I have no other choice but to put it down on the page to try and make sense of it.

 What are your top tips for someone starting out in their writing career?  Get ready for rejection, not just in the early stage but for the rest of your career. Be humble that way, but not modest – take risks.

Becoming ‘established’ is not the main goal. The joy lies in the writing. I am saying this especially as a carer. At the end of a really hard day, I can always write. No one can take this away from me. I am fiercely protective of my writing time.

 Finally, keep reading those writers who you know nourish you but read outside your familiar voices too. Reading English-language memoirs has been enriching and transformative for me.

 Anything else you would like to say? Your story matters. No one else can write it but you. You never know who might read your words and see themselves in them. Connection is key, especially in the fracturing times we are living.

Are you inspired by Carole’s journey? Our Life Writing Programme starts again in October run by Holly Dawson and Katy Massey. We’re running a taster day on 19th September. Why not come along and see if the programme is for you?